Awkward moment #1:
I was sitting at the desk in the file room because my manager was out of the office this morning. I was talking to my student worker friend about vaccinations (long story) when this woman from the other side of the office walks in. I see her fairly frequently, and even though we've been introduced before, she is like everyone else from the counseling side of the office who avoids eye contact and polite hellos when I walk by in the hall. Anyway, she seemed startled that I was sitting at my manager's desk, and she said, "Are you on the phone?" I looked over at the phone sitting in the cradle and wondered if she was trying to call the number and is accusing me of yapping away at work. Anyway, I told her no, and she gave me this crazy look and said, "Were you talking to yourself then?" I looked at her as if she was crazy, then I look over at my student worker, who is also looking at the woman like she was crazy. Then Crazy Lady sees Student Worker and realizes that I'm not telling myself that I should get a tetanus shot.
Crazy Lady shrugged it off and said, "I don't think we've met. I'm M." Then she began to ask me about a file. Meanwhile, Student Worker and I still glared at her. I was fairly offended that a. M forgot who I was and it took this long for her to take the initiative to re-introduce herself, and b. She thought I was the crazy one, even though whenever I see her in the hall I think that she reminds me of post-Bobby Brown Whitney Houston. Now I will get more delight out of her shouting, "Hell to the No!" in my head.
Awkward Moment #2
Remember the Fuckhead Twins? Well, the one "who looks sort of like a middle-aged investment banker trapped in a nineteen-year-old's body" was in the elevator that I took down to the first floor on my lunch break. He was wearing a suit, reinforcing my theory that he's two shitty poems away from pursuing an BS in finance. I avoided eye contact and acted like I didn't see him even though there was no one else on the elevator. Apparently he works at the bank on the first floor, which makes me want to walk down there right now and get a roll of quarters (I need to do laundry real bad) from him and pretend like I have never seen him anymore.
It's the little things that get me through the day.