Friday, July 27, 2007

I'm sitting here daydreaming of his pornographic fan-fiction right now.

Because I rely heavily on public transportation and I have "Be Crazy Around Me" stamped on my forehead, I've gotten to the point where I expect someone to talk to me on the El.

Today I was reading my copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, and I finished the chapter I was on a few stops away from Bryn Mawr, so I put my bookmark in place and closed the book. I made brief eye contact with a sad-looking sap of a man across the train, and before I could look away and pretend I didn't see him, he opened his mouth. Here we go, I thought.

"I was kind of disappointed with that," he said.

"Ah," I said, not wanting to give him the idea that I wanted to talk to him.

"Have you read [Blah Diddity Blah Blah Boring Old Fantasy Novel Whose Title I Can't Remember]?"

"No," I replied.

"It's by the guy who wrote the Tarzan books. Well, in that book, the plot follows this pattern where the main character gets into these sticky situations and the tenision builds up each time and then by the stroke of luck he gets out of it. And it happens over and over again that by the time you get to the climax, you don't care anymore."

"Oh." Shit, four more stops to go.

"You've read more than half the book," he said, as he glanced at my bookmark sticking out, "so you've probably noticed it."


"It just sucks because she didn't follow that pattern in the other books. And what about Fred and George?! The Weasleys are hardly in this book! I waited for TWO YEARS daydreaming about what kind of wizarding weapons they might be experimenting with, and nothing!"

"Uh huh," I said, fully embarrassed as his excited pitch woke up the dude who was sleeping nearby.

He calmed down after that and, thankfully, got off at the next stop.

I think the most ironic part of this was that Adam was sitting next to me and was reading an anthology of Philip K. Dick novels. And this dude picked ME as the closest nerd to strike up a conversation with!


BG5000 said...

No one wants to talk to a pit bull. Especially a pit bull reading Phillip K. Dick.

Yeti said...

you didn't happen to get this guy's number??