This morning I received an email from my mother. She sometimes will write specifically to ask me something and then add short references to what's going on in her life.
The actual reason she emailed me this morning was to ask if I have gotten any tax forms from my bank. It was a short and sweet paragraph, getting right down to business.
Then, she goes into the breaking news segment:
"I have an appointment in Richmond at 1:30 for a mammogram today, so I’m not going to work this morning."
She just put that right out there. Hey, that's not awkward at all. I'm just glad my mother is keeping things in check.
[Side Note: One night a couple of years ago, my mother mentioned that she had an appointment for a mammogram the next day. She said that to prepare for the checkup she was going to go out to the garage and place herself between the car's tire and the cold cement floor. I hope you have something to look forward to now, ladies.]
Luckily, the medical information stopped there, and she turned to news in the entertainment world:
"For some reason we had Showtime and the Movie Channel over the weekend (in fact, we still do this AM), so we watched Crash last night. I thought it was really good. It was hard to watch though."
I don't really remember anything from Crash that was "hard to watch." I'm also surprised that it is on Showtime already, so I'm kind of hoping that she watched this Crash by accident.
After wrapping it up with a quick "Love you, Mom," she realized that she forgot to mention the best part:
"P.S. I also tried to watch Liza with a Z, but it was awful – what a ho. She was on Ellen’s talk show one night last week, and she must be the world’s biggest idiot."
So there's your news. Mammograms are no fun, Crash is kind of rough, and Liza Minelli is a ho.