Friday, February 09, 2007

Who needs PBS? I'm learning everything I need to know on my own.

I've been suffering from blogger apathy lately. Nothing really interesting has been happening of late, and when I do try to write blog posts based on my opinions (which are always right) I end up getting bored because the Internet is fickle and not as accepting of my opinions as it should be. (This little guy and I have a lot in common.) Also, I know that if I wrote a blog post defending Dreamgirls as a relatively good movie musical (definitely not Best Picture quality but far superior to Chicago) based on my film studies background (I took film genres once and we focused on musicals), some a-hole (I'm talking to you, my Google Reader-using frenemy) would leave a d-bag comment about it. Also, it's time I get "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going" out of my head.

So instead of giving you a top ten list of my favorite movie musicals (with commentary - you're really missing it, you guys!) (1. Fiddler on the Roof, 2. Singin' in the Rain, 3. All That Jazz, 4. Little Shop of Horrors, 5. The Music Man, 6. Top Hat, 7. Jesus Christ Superstar, 8. Camp, 9. Dancer in the Dark, 10. Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory SORRY I COULDN'T HELP IT) and my least-favorites (1. The Sound of Music, 2. The Sound of Music, 3. The Sound of Music, 4. The Sound of Music, 5. The Sound of Music, 6. The Sound of Music, 7. The Sound of Music, 8. The Sound of Music, 9. The Sound of Music, 10. The Sound of Music), I'll give you a list of lessons I learned this week. These are important ones, folks.

1. If I buy sweaters at H&M every week, I will most likely overdraw my account.

2. Having multiple strangers compliment me on said sweaters only encourages the overdrawing of my account.

3. The Puppy Bowl is still more exciting than the Super Bowl, although the Bissell Kitten Half Time Show paled in comparison to Prince and "Purple Rain".

4. I am completely nuts and will get mad and loved ones in my head even though it's really just ME who is in a bad mood. This will escalate into me thinking that I'm legitimately mad at people, when it's just me being crazy. Morgan gave me these wise words: "When I feel that way, I just say to myself, 'Morgan, not all of your feelings are valid.'" This will be my new mantra: "You're opinions may be completely on-target, but your feelings are on the fast track to Crazytown."

5. [Redacted]

6. The death of Anna Nicole Smith is the only reason I would purposely watch Nancy Grace. What an entertaining episode that was last night.

7. I'm becoming addicted to Law and Order: SVU against my best intentions. I hate it. I love it. I hate it! I love it! I hate it and I love it! It's something about my pedophiliaphilia combined with completely unrealistic story lines involving big corporations poisoning people or the Indian (dots) Zach Braff (or is he the Indian Ryan Reynolds? discuss amongst yourselves).

8. I learned that I love (and slightly hate) Sarah Vowell, as I am currently reading Assassination Vacation.

9. I only ever want to see Carl and the Passions perform improv. They are the. best. group. ever.

10. Despite its closing a few weeks ago for health code violations, I will still patronize the McDonald's down the street from my office.


each of the two said...

i read assasination vacation, very good and i feel that it would be nice to be friends with the slightly neurotic Sarah V, you know the kind of friend whose calls you rarely answer.

BTW as i kinda stalk your blog, you inspired me to write my own.
(which i am already annoyed with yet cant stop)

check it out if you want.

Anonymous said...

Try Take the Cannoli too.
And also, I would probably answer Sarah's callls. That is unless she needed a ride (see "Drive Through Please"). I'm not really that dependable or caring.

-Still Anonymous

Lisa said...

We can no longer be friends, Tyler. Fiddler on the Roof is your favorite movie musical of all time? Pshaw.

Ever heard of another Julie Andrews gem called Mary Poppins??? It's supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

Tyler said...

Lisa, you know how much I love the Jews. I can't deal with The Sound of Music because singing Nazis make me uncomfortable.

I'd put Mary Poppins at number eleven.

Anonymous said...

According to lesson number four, you admit that you're exactly like mom. Congratulations. That'll keep you up at night.


sarah said...

I really enjoyed this post, despite the fact that we're clearly having some sort of unspoken feud about "Dreamgirls." Or, I mean, we are now. Or something.

gutenmegan said...

Rolfe is the only singing Nazi in the entire movie!

Well, the only singing Nazi with a solo.

Katy said...

You a-hole. The Nazis don't sing. Rolf was just a messenger when he sang with Liesel.
Dead to me.

Chris said...

Sarah Vowell is my girl crush. I will fight you for her.

Tatanka said...

I'll have to disagree with you on the "little" comment, but I understand how hard it is being right all the time.